Dinosaurs and Dandelions: Scandal! Cap'N Crunch's Qualifications Questioned!!

| Matt Facts: Matthew dislikes drinking cold drinks from coffee mugs. He also hates plastic forks. | | Did you Know? Toothpicks are overrated. | | Words of Inspiration: "You can tell a lot about a fellow by the way he eats Jelly Beans" – R.Regan | | Did you know? There are no Pez Facts. Pez is, in fact, not factual. | | Matt Facts: Matthew's fortune cookies always predict success. | | Words of Inspiration: When I'm sad I stop being sad and be awesome instead - Barney Stinson | | Did you know? "Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo” is a grammatically valid sentence. | | Matt Facts: Matthew is best served on the rocks with a slice of lemon. | | Words of Inspiration: "Life is futile." | | Did you Know? Dinosaurs and Dandelions is the name of a popular blog that has been around since the 15 April 2010 | | Matt Facts: Unlike some people, Matthew only celebrates his birthday once a year. | | Words of Inspiration: "I'll be back" - The Terminator. | | Did you Know? The two modern breeds of Cocker Spaniel, American and English, are thought to have been descended from only two dogs? | | Matt Facts: On the second to last full moon of the year, Matthew develops an itch on his right shoulder. | | Words of Inspiration: “You can do it!” - Rob Schneider, in every Adam Sandler movie ever | | Did you know? Lettuce is often eaten raw. | | Words of Inspiration: "Science is always at work and never sleeps – just like Rust" | | Did you Know? When you dream, everything you see in that dream, you’ve seen before in real life. | | Matt Facts: Matthew officially endorses the Cadbury's Moro bar as being delicious | | Did You Know? A tadpole is also called a 'pollywog'. | | Matt Facts: Matthew has his own Facebook fan page. Creepy. | | Did You Know? Cats sleep for 70% of their lives. | | Words of Inspiration: "End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it." - Gandalf. | | Did you Know? This is the end. The journey ends here. Then it starts all over again. |

Friday, 21 June 2013

Scandal! Cap'N Crunch's Qualifications Questioned!!

In a surprisingly serious development this week, the nautical credibility of Cap'N Crunch was bought into question when troublesome trolls from Reddit identified that H. M. Crunch (real name Horatio Magellan) has three stripes on his uniform, instead of the four worn by a US Navy Captain. Three stripes identifies someone of the rank of Commander, who would report to a Captain.

The crisis then deepened for H. M. Crunch, with the US Navy stating that it had checked its personnel records and had no record of his service. Speculation quickly spread that he may have instead served in the French Navy, as in France three stripes signifies a Frigate Captain and he does sport a Napoleon style hat.

The maker of Cap'N Crunch cereal, Quakers*, was forced into damage control mode, stating that as he captains his own ship, the S.S. Guppy, he is a captain regardless of military rank, or service.

However, the debate rages on...

*what is with cereal companies with religious connotations?? I'm looking at you Sanitarium!